Your scent pulls me back
by Lololova
Summary: Prompt: What would've happened if Castle arrived home before Kate could've gone out with her clothes, what if he silently witnessed her picking up his shirt in order to draw in his scent? One shot


_Prompt: What would've happened if Castle arrived home before Kate could've gone out with her clothes, what if he silently witnessed her picking up his shirt in order to draw in his scent?_

* * *

Kate Beckett came here in order to simply pack a bag with clothes and then get out before her husband came home. Now, standing here, with the bag fully packed, she notices the shirt he's forgotten to put in the bin for being washed. Without really thinking she carefully steps to it, thinking about the case they just had. Mia Laszlo is quite a hard person to deal with but the way she talks about scent makes Kate miss him even more. _And his shirt is just lying there_. She reaches her hand towards the shirt and picks it up, her eyes not leaving the material. He must've left it on the chair yesterday because she can feel his scent even when it's still far from her nose. Doesn't stop her from taking a shattering breath right before she burries her nose in it. His scent takes over all her senses and she can't hold back the tears anymore. Being apart from him like this is killing her, even if it is to keep him safe. She almost lost him once, and she'd not willing to go through that again. Especially not because of her obsession to find justice. _But god she miss him_. She takes another big breath of him and closes her eyes as she remembers all the times she's waken up with his scent all around her. Waking up with his body around hers. His lips against her naked shoulder, slowly kissing her awake. _Fuck, it hurts_. She puts the shirt a few inches away from her, sobbing out as a few more tears runs down her cheeks. Why does she have to be the way she is? Maybe she should just tell him. Stop this nonsense. Probably not a good idea until this thing is put to rest. She's keeping his shirt though. _And leaving one of hers_.

"Kate?"

She jumps at the sound of his voice, turns around to find him staring at her from the doorway. Quickly she swipes her hand under her nose and eyes, tries to get rid of her tears even though she knows it's already too late. He sees her tears. _Fuck_.

"I was just leaving," she says but her feet are frozen to the floor. _His_ are not.

"Are you okay?" He's within her space faster than she thinks is possible, his fresh scent invading her senses.

Her fingers clench the material still in her hands. Taking it with her home without him knowing seems like an impossible task now. Especially since his eyes are going down and, _fuck,_ she sees the second he notices the shirt. _She's screwed_.

"Wha-" his fingers reach out to touch the material, holding it up slightly to see what she's holding exactly. "My shirt…" She closes her eyes, knows he's smart enough. "My scent." _Shit_.

She bites her lower lip, feels yet another tear roll down her cheeks. When she feels his fingers carefully touching her cheek her eyes pop open with surprise, his fingers sending the same tingles down her veins as they always do. It only made her eyes tear up more. She miss his touch too much.

"You know, Mia told me you still love me. She could tell by the pheromones your body releases whenever I am around." Castle says in a lower tone than normal.

"Of course I do! Castle, I...I told you, it's not you." Kate pulls his shirt onto her chest, takes a step back because she knows that if she doesn't create distance between them she won't resist him.

"Then what, Kate?! What happened when you were gone? What happened when Vikram gave you the code red?" His frustration is enough to make her sob again, make her look away from him with her own frustration clear in mind.

"It's not safe," she breathes out on another sob.

She feels his hand land on her shoulder and she feels her body give in, refusing to fight anymore. He turns her around without any restriction, makes her look at him by palming her jaw and pulling up her head.

"When has it ever been safe for the two of us?" he asks and she sees the hurt and pain in his blues. The same blues that could calm her panic attacks, the same blues that could race her heart with the looks he gave her on a daily basis.

"This is different," she whispers but he shakes his head, moving his body closer to hers. His scent is invading her privacy, and it's _not helping_.

"I'd rather be unsafe _with_ you than safe without you," he says with a dangerously strong voice. He isn't joking around, never do when it comes to something this serious anymore.

Carefully she starts looking deeper into his blues, showing her vulnerability through her own. She knows the second he sees she'd letting him in, because at the same time as he shows the pain he's endured she can almost see the joy of finally getting through to her again. When it gets too much she lets her eyes flicker down to his lips, her mind focusing on what it feels like to be pecked by them, touched by them. Imagines the way his love always made her feel extraordinary, safe, strong, like she could do anything if she just put her mind to it.

"I can't lose you, I'd _die_ if I lost you," she whispers on a broken breath.

"You know that is exactly how it feels for me too right? If you get yourself killed… I've already watched you die once Kate, I'm not doing it again," he reminds her and her hand immediately abandons his shirt to creep towards the old scar.

Castle gently wraps his fingers around the shirt she's holding and starts pulling it away from her. She tries to fight him, keeping her fingers clenched around the shirt as if it was the only thing she had left of the person she loves, but when he lets go of a growl she's distracted and lets go as she looks up at him with raised eyebrows.

"You don't need this, you'll never need this," he growls as he dips down much faster than she can anticipate it. His lips crash onto hers and she lets go of a surprised mewl before it turns into a moan.

She's paralyzed to resist him, always will be. Her fingers itch and she starts tracing them into him, clenching them in the shirt he's currently wearing. Just as she starts getting weak in her knees he brushes his tongue against her lower lip and she feels his hands land on her hip in order to steady her when his tongue meets hers. She can't stop the quivering of her breath as she kisses him with the same fever he is kissing her. _She's missed him too much_. Her control, or whatever she's calling it, completely faltered and she started unbuttoning his shirt, wanting nothing more than to feel his warm skin against hers. It doesn't take long before her fingers trembles across his warm chest, tracing the lines she knows by heart. He shudders at the touch and she can tell he's missed her as much as she's missed him by the grip he has on her hips, his fingers digging deep into her skin. She's not _hesitant_ but at the same time she's not exactly _happy_ to pull her fingers away from his chest to hold them above her head, it does leave her with her shirt on the ground though with her bra following not long after. And that she has no complains about whatsoever.

She does however let go of a restrained mewl, showing her dislike of having to take her hands off of him. Before she can let her fingers trace their way back he grabs her wrists though, which has her growling with disagreement. He doesn't budge as he starts backing her towards the bed, _their_ bed. She feels her heart flutter as he pushes her down into the sheets, never letting go of her hands as he lands halfway on top of her. He keeps her hands trapped beneath his right next to her head as he pulls away from her lips in order to let his eyes roam her body with a hunger she hasn't seen since that first night of theirs. Before she can comment on it, get emotional about the choices that led them to here, he takes her lips with his to ravage her mouth. She moans at the assault as her hips start moving by their own accords, wanting nothing more than friction, _not just any friction, him, _between her legs.

"Now you're staying here," he mumbles against her lips and just as she's about to ask what he means she feels the metal against her skin, hears the familiar click lock above her head.

She immediately rips her lips from his in order to look up as she pulls her hands downwards, only for them to get nowhere.

"You _cuffed me_?!" she screams through a whisper, shock entering her face.

"Yes," he simply agrees and sits up to look down at her. It actually sends thrills down her belly and she can't stop the anticipation she feels filling up her whole body.

Soon enough he's leaning down again, taking her mouth with a fever that makes her realize he's mentally preparing for this to be the last chance at getting her back. She feels her heart break at that realization, doesn't he know how much she loves him? She tries pouring all of her love for him into the kiss before he starts pulling away in order to kiss down her cheek, her jaw, her neck, and _fuck_ it has her moaning more than she ever moaned before. The sensations and emotions shocking her body with each kiss, each nip, each _lick_, has her squirming with want and need. Without success she starts pulling at her hands, wants nothing more than to touch him the way he's touching her, but the cuffs won't budge and she slightly remembers the spare cuffs she's kept in her night table since she moved in. His lips reaches the scar between her breasts and she feels him lingering there, warming the scar that had been so cold for so long before that first time he'd found it with his lips.

Then it's like he's attacking her breast, her nipple to be more specific, and she's letting go of a scream when he starts sucking. Once again her hands try to get free, even though her mind knows it's impossible without the key. Her body moved on its own accord as it tries to get a more feel of him. She can feel him at her belly and she's trying so hard to show him she's already ready for him. He's never needed much to turn her on, not even before they got together. When she feels him letting go of her nipple she starts thinking that perhaps he's gotten the message, but then he treats her other breast the exact same way while one of his hands is massaging the breast he left. He scrapes his teeth over her nipple and has her screaming his name when she feels herself orgasm from his assault. His lips are moving from her breast then, slow kisses across her belly as she's trying to get her breathing back to normal. Just as she's opening her mouth to give her voice a chance at other than screaming, his lips is kissing and nipping at her skin just above her pants. It has her breathing hitch as his fingers join him to unbutton her jeans, the feel of the zipper going down only turning her hotter and wetter before he pulls down both her pants and panties in one go.

"Fuck, Castle!" she hisses when he, without warning or hesitation, puts his lips exactly where she needs friction.

She can't keep still, her hips moving on their own accord, and he decides not to let her. He puts his hands on her hips and keeps them still and it frustrates the hell out of her. She let's go of complaining growls as her hands start tugging again, the metal clinking against the headboard above her and, _fuck_, she's close again. His tongue is doing wicked things to her and just as she's about to fall over the edge again he adds two fingers plunging into her, making her scream his name again. He slips his fingers slow in and out to prolong her orgasm before he takes them out in order to lick them clean, his eyes meeting hers.

"I've missed tasting you, I've missed the opportunity to taste you in your new office the way we talked about during the summer."

She feels shivers going down her spine as she thinks about all the things he'd whispered during the summer, the things he would be able to do to her once the blinds were down and they were alone in her office. Even though she had constantly said she would never agree to them she had been just as turned on thinking about it as he had.

"Castle," she says, tugging at her hands again, "please." She's not sure what she's asking of him though, if it's about getting free or the need of having him inside her that's talking. _Maybe it's both_. He's not one to hesitate though, he starts kissing his way up her body, once again teasing her nipples on his way before he locks mouth with her. Their tongues start the familiar dance as she feels him stripping above her, his pants and boxers getting out of the way so that she can, _finally_, feel his skin against hers. He doesn't push inside her immediately, but waits and continues to tease by letting his manhood slip and slide against her wet folds, not once slipping inside. She lets go of frustrated moans, letting him know exactly what he's doing to her, how sexually frustrated she is because he just _won't give it to her_. But then again, maybe this is his revenge, his way of letting her know exactly how he's felt this entire time. _That's why he cuffed her_. "I'm sorry," she mumbles against his lips and without a second thought he slips inside of her, making her groan in sync with him.

At first she thinks he'll want and make it rough and fast but to her biggest surprise yet he's not rushing it. He lets her adjust to him because it's been a while and he knows she needs a second before he starts moving. When he does, it's like everything is finally falling back to place. It's not rough, it's not fast, not like she thought it would be. Every movement, every touch is filled with love. As she tries her best to move her hips to match the rhythm he's setting she feels his hands move from her sides, his fingers soon back to pleasuring her breasts and she feels him start losing control. His thrusts are still loving but as she's starting to beg him for faster and harder he's complying and their rhythm change into one of the more frantic rhythms they set when one of both of them needed big relief. It doesn't take long before they're close, both having so much pent up frustration inside of them that they're both muffling screams inside each other's mouths as they reach the peak together.

* * *

Kate must've dozed off for a few seconds after the intense orgasm she had because when she opens her eyes again it's because she feels his fingers gently unlocking the cuffs. She's too exhausted to lift her hands, remove them from above her head, and isn't really surprised when she feels his hands taking care of that for her. Once the cuffs are out of the way he's pulling her closer, laying her head onto his shoulder while taking her hands towards his mouth. He starts kissing the red lines across her wrists, the lines that had come due to the cuffs. It hadn't hurt in the moment, her guess is her adrenaline and pleasure had taken care of that pain, but right now it does hurt a little.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles against her wrists, lips still kissing the burnt skin. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

She snuggles closer into him, taking back her left hand in order to lay comfortably but letting him keep the right hand by his lips. She's not sure what does it, the kisses, the amazing love-making or simply his comfort, but her tears are suddenly unstoppable. There's not a single sound coming out of her mouth though, not a single sniffle sounding in the room. Which is probably why he's reacting the way he is when he feels the water reach his skin. He's pushing her away slightly as he's crouching up onto his elbow to be able to look down at her, observing her as she's trying to avoid his blue eyes by setting them towards the ceiling.

"Kate?" His voice is not much more than a whisper and she clenches her eyes shut.

"I've screwed up, I just wanted you safe but I've screwed up, I can't do this anymore," she's trembling and he picks up her right hand again to give it kisses.

"I'm only safe if I'm with you," he says gently. "We're better off together, Kate, you know that."

She nods, _of course she knows that_. "I know. I'm sorry."

"It's okay," he whispers, putting her hand on his chest to let her feel his heartbeat. It's calm and definitely the reason her own heart is calming down. Her left hand reaches for his jaw, her fingers trickling down his skin, tracing the patterns she's memorized by heart.

"I walked out on our marriage because I met with someone, someone who told me I couldn't pursue the bad guys if I wasn't ready to lose you… and so I tried to let you go instead, tried to push you away. I don't want to lose you, but I didn't realize I might've lost you by pushing you away." She wants to tell him everything, _everything_, but she figures she can only start with pieces.

"Who?" he asks with confusion.

"She said she was your stepmom, _Rita_, which is probably the reason she seemed to be mad at me for needing to find the people behind everything. She probably didn't want you hurt any more than I do," she tells him.

And then she tells him everything. Answers every question he might have. She's still afraid she will lose him, but the way he keeps kissing her hand, her face, every once in a while and keeps her hand over his heart, she's seeing a light in the tunnel for the first time in months. They could do this. They could _win_ this. As long as they went into the fight _together_.

_THE END_

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_A/N:_

_So sorry for not publishing anything in so long. I don't really know what's wrong with me, I have these moments of pure inspiration and then when I finally have time to sit down and write it's like they walk right past me. These last couple of days has been due to sickness though, along with the worries of the operation my mom was scheduled to do this Friday. The operation went well so no more worries on that side, but i still think I might be having/getting a fever so the end of this one shot might not make a whole lot of sense and probably even sucks, but I need to publish something or else I'm going crazy myself. Anyway, hope you enjoyed it, love you all._

_Until next time, xxxx_


End file.
